As lawyers, it's easy to become myopic—caught up in the chaos, mechanics, and technicalities of dispute resolution. Divorce, at its core, revolves around two key elements: financial matters and the parenting plan. Financials are relatively straightforward; we gather income, assets, liabilities, and debts, input the numbers into a third-party software program, and accept the results. The parenting plan, however, is far more complex—more art than science.

While a parenting plan may officially end when a child graduates high school, its impact lasts for decades. How parents handle residential schedules, decision-making, and dispute resolution will shape their family’s future long after our legal work concludes. Because of this, our role extends beyond legal advocacy—we must guide our clients to focus on “process and controllables.” As Ben Franklin wisely put it, “If you would persuade, appeal to interest and not to reason.” The same principle applies when navigating parenting plan conflicts.

Our job is twofold: first, to help uncover the opposing party’s interests and shift negotiations from rigid positional arguments to deeper, interest-based discussions. Second, to prepare our clients to anticipate and effectively manage their ex-spouse’s behavior. While they cannot control their ex, they can control their own responses—an essential skill for long-term co-parenting success.

This CLE course will provide new lawyers with foundational knowledge and offer seasoned attorneys a fresh perspective on viewing the parenting plan through the client’s lens. While our representation may last 18 months, for the client, the parenting plan is a lifelong reality. Our goal is to equip them with strategies for day-to-day interactions, including:

• Interest-based negotiation techniques
• Navigating impasse and alternative options outside a fully agreed parenting plan
• Recognizing and overcoming cognitive biases in divorce
• Developing tools for maintaining self-control in high-conflict situations
• Lastly, negotiation is not just a professional skill—it’s part of everyday life.

While this course focuses on managing “process and controllables” in parenting plans, the principles apply broadly to dispute resolution in any setting.